Friendship Agreement

Friendship Agreement

This agreement is made as of the 29th day of March, 2009.

Between:

Ninsassin
(the "Individual")

And:

Seventy
(the "Anomaly")

WHEREAS:

A. A bond of friendship will be kept between Individual and Anomaly if and only if the terms listed in this contract are followed.
B. A bond of friendship will be broken, with penalty, if the terms are not properly followed.

This agreement is hereby witness to:

A. The terms - considers the requirements necessary for the Anomaly to remain as a friend of the Individual.

B. Services - considers all actions the Individual expects from the Anomaly.

C. Compensation - considers all returns and payments towards the Anomaly by the Individual if the terms and services of this contract are followed

D. Terms of Cancellation - considers the punishment of each respective party should the contract be violated after approval or before an arbitrary Termination Date.

Section A - Terms

1. The Anomaly must not expand their body mass pass a certain weight threshold.

2. The Anomaly must not expand their body mass such that their physical image is no longer "pretty" (As defined by the Individual).

Section B - Services

1. Anomaly must endure...
a. Excessive compliments.

b. Sexism.

c. Critically impaired judgement.

2. Anomaly must accept...
a. All sincere invitations to play Defense of the Ancients.

Section C - Compensation

In return, the Individual must compensate, by the terms of the contract, to the Anomaly, a value of at least three (3) pieces of currency (as defined in (1) of this section) per game of Defense of the Ancients.

1. Whereas currency is the amount of sacrificial hero deaths.

Section D - Violation

In the event that this contract is breached without prior warning from the Anomaly, accepted by the Individual, the Anomaly is thereby subject to the following fines.

1. The delivery of a personally hand-made Sandwich to the Individual.

a. Whereas a Sandwich is defined as "Bread, Ham, Lettuce, Tomato, Bread", with other optional elements included.

IN ACCORDANCE WITH the Individual and Anomaly having both read through and agreeing with all statements contained within this contract, then this Agreement will have been executed as shown by the signatures of both parties below.



BY: ______________________


Ninsassin


BY: ______________________


Seventy

SCANNER + PEN + PAPER = ???

I have all these tools and resources at work, yet I have failed to use them properly.

Materials:
-Scanner
-Internet
-Computer
-Pen
-Paper
-Being Bored
-Retardation

COMPUTER GEOMETRY

Dear Reader

You are bad.

A is for awful

B is for bad

C is for crazy

D is for dumb

E is for emo

F is for fat

G is for gross

H is for hideous

I is for idiot

J is for jealous

K is for klutz

L is for lazy

M is for mean

N is for naughty

O is for offensive

P is for pathetic

Q is for queer

R is for retarded

S is for selfish

T is for terrible

U is for ugly

V is for vain

W is for weird

X is for xenophobic

Y is for yucky

Z is for zero good things about you.

Article 15

Section I - Applicable to situations in which your emotional state is imbalanced and tilted towards a certain affinity.

Part A
On the premises in which your emotional state is imbalanced and tilted towards negativity.

1. I will cheer you up.
2. I will listen.
3. I will try to give feedback.
4. I will try to offer a solution.
5. I will let you cry on my shoulder if need be.

Part B
On the premises in which your emotional state is imbalanced and tilted towards positivity.

1. I will be happy with you.
2. I will be happy for you.
3. I will do all that I can to keep you happy.

Section II - Amendments or Violations

Part A
Conditions of amending the already existing contract between client and lover.

1. Argue.
i. If the argument tilts in the client favor, the lover must make a compromise based on his or her discretion during the time of the situation.
ii. If the argument tilts in the lover's favor, the client must make a compromise based on his or her discretion during the time of the situation.
iii. If there is no solution reached during the duration of the argument, refer to Article 17, Section 5, Part C.

2. One party decides to step down.
i. In such a case, the party who has not stepped down is allowed to dictate the details of the amendment.

Part B
1. Any violation made to the contract will receive a proper fine and punishment according to the other party.
2. Any appeals made for violations must refer to Article 15, Section II, Part A, 1.

Section III - Terms of compensation.
Part A
1. Both parties must remain loyal to each other, as well as the terms of the contract.
2. Each contractor shall love the one signed to his or her paired contract.
3. Extra rewards may be given at each client's own discretion only if the situation warrants such an action.

If you love me, and have read and agree to the terms above, please sign below.

Client's Name __________________

Client's Signature __________________

Date __________________

Love,

Contractor's Name __________________

Contractor's Signature __________________

Date __________________